Why Not Me?

Why Not me? Why could I not be allowed to take Gayl's place and spare her the pain and suffering? I do nothing of any real worth, just do computers for the government. She is a true doctor. She saved lives. She is compassionate and caring. She gave freely of her medical knowledge to anyone, without charge. Think of that, a doctor working to help a patient for free! She was a wonder to behold when fighting to save a patient or preserve them from worse damage. She would be covered in blood, ordering nurses hither and yon, using equipment, making decisions almost faster than you could keep up; as God is my witness, no one ever worked harder to serve each and every person they treated. Or when someone was dying, if they were alone she would sit with them and comfort them as they met eternity. What a wonderful person. What a wonderful and unique doctor. And all she got in return were false accusations by Nifolg-like attorneys and state bureaucrats. No one in power ever said that she was a great doctor. Well, she is and always will be. She loved life, loved people, and served her patients. Compared to her, I do nothing for mankind of any worth or lasting value. I work hard and do my job; but at the end of the day I just go home and work. She came home with lives saved and people's lifes' turned around for the better. She cared for everyone, and gave freely. So, why could I not take her place in the tumbril? I have nothing of value, but could have if I had saved her. But I even failed in that. With cancer, there is no tomorrow; we were 4 and 1 against cancer but it only takes one defeat. I would have taken her place at any time and spared her any or all she endured, but was never given the chance. So, why not me? What is so great about me that I should live instead of her? Nothing comes to mind. She is the best person I will ever know, and the one truly good thing I could have done is taken her place, but I could not find a way to do so. A wonderful doctor and person is lost to mankind; and no one notices. Gayl is the greatest. Know this, Gayl is the greatest.